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When I found my love of beats   
05:59am 27/10/2006
mood: jubilant
I just worked out where i found my love for percussion/drumming

And i almost wept with joy at finding the absolute point when something changed my life (well, when i found something i loved)

There was footage, part of some soung/montage scene , not on the Seseme Street itself, a guy on Seseme street who played the spoons and he had this wooden doll/figure that as he played it "danced" in time on a peice of wood , tapping out crazy rythms along with the spoons . I can see it in my head and remember the wacked out beats as well.

That was when i found/knew i liked percussion.

This was the old days of Seseme Street (around 1976 when i was born til about 1982) , the days with Mr Hooper(He died in 1982) and Buffy the native american woman(she left in 1981) who played the mouth harp. (Hamble would have still been on Playschool as well)

Interesting Fact! : I was actually listening to by Prodigy when this dawned on me , I think it was the hard snare beats and synthetic hi-hats at start that has that wooden-dancing-figure and spoons rythym

FROM WIKIPEDIA http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoon

Spoons (not a single one) can be played as a makeshift percussion instrument, or more specifically, an idiophone related to the castanets. A pair of spoons is held with concave sides facing out and with a finger between their handles to space them apart. When the pair is struck, the spoons sharply hit each other and then spring back to their original position. The spoons are typically struck against the knee and the palm of the hand. The fingers and other body parts may also be used as striking surfaces to produce different sounds and for visual effect.

Spoons as an instrument are associated in the United States with American folk music, minstrelsy, and jug and spasm bands. These musical genres make use of other everyday objects as instruments, such as the washboard and the jug. In addition to common tableware, musical instrument suppliers make spoons that are joined at the handle. Bobby Hebb is a well-known spoons player.

The b-side of Clive Dunn's UK number one hit single, "Grandad", was called "I Play the Spoons".

The U.S. rock band Soundgarden had a hit single in 1993 called "Spoonman", which featured spoons being played as percussion instruments.

On Doctor Who, the Seventh Doctor, (Sylvester McCoy), was known for bursts of spoon-playing.


HOW TO PLAY THE SPOONS - Possibly the most detailed instructions ever on spoon playing

The boy who couldnt breathe   
02:08pm 16/10/2006
  Crancifus was always a strange young boy, always delighting in beetles and other small things that go.

One night when going to bed , his father came into his room to read him a bed time story, as was the normal ritual.

This night the story was a bit different than usual , it was of a boy who one day changed into a beetle , this boy eventually died. It seems he became a beetle by breathing in the magic dusts released from a beetles wings as it flew and capered in the sun.

Crancifus thought long and hard about this story, long into the night , eyes wide and in fear....he did not sleep well.

The next day Crancifus was out in the garden with his mother weeding the flower beds when he saw a small beetle.

As quick as a fox he held his breath in fear of breathing in the magic dust.
Quickly he ran indoors and breathed a sigh of safety

He looked around , hoping no one saw him , he was a bit embarrassed.
Then he heard a buzzing sound....a fly...in his room! wings flapping magic dust releasing.

He held his breath again and looked around for a safe place to flee...The Cupboard!

Quickly he hid himself in the cupboard with his coats and shoes and breathed a sigh of relief.

He felt something near his foot.....His eyes wide as saucers he looked down....at his feet...and saw a silverfish!

He held his breath again and looked for safety! He shook the door and ran out of the closet.

Buzzing...The fly was still in his room , he held his breath some more , his face was going red, his lungs ached.

he ran out side to his mother , hand fast on mouth , eyes bulging, lungs aching , running towards his mother

She looked at him "Crancifus, whats wrong?"

He looked at her and then the flowers

He saw the beetle and held his breath fast with all his might! he looked around for a place to run.

His mother stared at him , beguiled and in fear

He looked around for safety , a place to escape and breath, a butterfly! fluttering past its wings flapping releasing magic dust!

He started to feel faint , his lungs screamed in pain.

No longer could he hold on , his mother walking fast toward him yelling "Crancifus whats wrong?!"

His mind was spinning in fear , his lungs screaming in pain , his eyes bulging and his hand clamped fast.

Darkness swam over his eyes and the blood rushed from his head, darkness cloaked his mind and calmness washed over him as he felt himself fall to the soft grass

Crancifus had died, because he was a silly silly boy
Bets Quote evor!!!!   
07:02am 09/10/2006
  refering to my current MSN pic at the time::

"ilove my pic, i have the best pics, feel free to praise me whenever about my pics, i rock..but just say it in a cool way so you dont come off shallow"
The D.E.S.M.O.N.D. Aggressor   
04:00am 08/10/2006
  Chapter 1 - Gator gets a wake up call

13:00hr 200 meters over the Zarg Desert

Captain Mike Parallax flew his plane low over the salt flats, looking...looking for what?
He banked sharply and saw a faint glimmer of metal in the distance.

"I think I have spotted them, I’m going in.. For the kill...over"

The radio croaked back "Roger Mike, attack with aggression, over"

Mike flies at full speed towards his target, his trigger finger itching over his control stick.
The target comes into view, An enemy truck, full of components for the worst weapon ever devised, a truck belonging to the
Evil forces of G.A.T.O.R., the vicious terror group led by General Chaos.

Mike lines up the truck in his sights, and with a hell burst to fight lets blast with his missiles.
BLAMMO! , The truck explodes into one million peices, Mike banks for a second pass but sees that all the occupants are dead, strewn all over the salt flat, the white crystals slowly turning red with evil blood.

"Mission accomplished, I’m coming home" smugly says Mike into his mouthpiece

"Roger mike, good work..." says the control tower officer "...Good work"

Mike walks into General West's office, throws his cap on the table and walks to the small bar in the corner.
There he grabs the decanter and pours a highball glass of pure scotch, downing it in one gulp.

"It’s been a hard day Westie, what with being the only man in the world who can save it.."

"Your right" speaks the General " Only you can save the world, damn it... you against a billion plus men"
The General puffs on his pipe "But we know you’re the best, the best of the best, and all out lives are in your hands"

The General moves to the wall and pushes back a painting, behind it is a safe which he opens and removes a yellow envelop"
He walks back to the table and opens it

"This Mike, Is what we retrieved from the wreckage today, Its a blueprints for the deadliest weapon ever know...Come and see, This is your ultimate mission, Destroy It!"

Mike looks at the paper, on the top are the words that would change his life, 'Project D.E.S.M.O.N.D.'

"I see, And where is their base located" he spoke whilst walking over to get another drink..."Ive still got two hours before dinner, I’m sure I can get it over with by then"

"Whoa...Hang on there boy-o" The General says holding out his hands in a stop gesture "This is not any ordinary mission, G.A.T.O.R. has this place more fortified that anything you have seen, We need tactics and planning before we pull this mission off...The final mission ever...maybe". The General croaks hesitantly "...that’s if we don’t succeed"

Mike frowns and sips his drink in glumness,
'Damn' he thought 'I have charity work, looks like ill have to put that off, the starving children are going to bed hungry tonight’...he thinks as he summons up his new found strengths "Ill be in tomorrow, lets get this mission off the ground...stat!"

"Now mike, We need you in top form" the General spouts "So you are going to have to train up even harder for this mission, say 60 hours a week now, instead of the usual 50, ok, and we need you to have less love in your life, to keen your hate sense to a laser precision...no more going out and enjoying your usual high life eh?...."

Mike thought for a millisecond...putting the Generals problems, with his out of work pleasures, to the side... "But what else can I learn, I know all the training now, In fact I train all the armies of the free world, what else could I do...or learn?"

The General puffed his pipe, and then blew the smoke out of his nostrils "We have created a $23 zillion dollar simulation of your brain, we will use it so you can compete against yourself, you are the best in the world, this was our only option"

“Ok, I will do it, but now I must get to the bar and meet Murdock and Wings, we are having a drinking session and some gambling, and I can not miss it"

"Mike!" Yelled the General "Your testing your Limits now boy! why I ought to suspend you from service right now, why I..."

"I’m out of here!" Mike butted in "See you later Old man!" Mike grabbed his cap and strutted out the room"

"Mike...Mike! why you Come Back Here!! MIKE PARALAX YOU’RE SUSPENDED!" Yelled the General

Mike laughed as he cooly, lit a smoke and headed for the bar. He knew he couldn’t be suspended, he was the best the world had known and now the whole world depended on him.
Todays Answer   
03:58am 08/10/2006
mood: apathetic
Tommorow you will see a new face, this may be on televison or if you are out and about.
There will be no excuses for not having clothing.
It will be time to make a decission about somehting.
Your luck number is 3.
Goblins - The Truth   
03:55am 08/10/2006
mood: blah

Goblins come into homes at night and attack you when you sleep.

the ruffle up your hair , spit in your mouth and pick your nose and eat it .

they also steal you bogies and use a special alchemy to make Grogans, wich is their money.

There is a bus that goes to Fuckoff Fairy land where they come from, it costs five Grogans to get there
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Things That Go...that I have eaten   
03:47am 08/10/2006
mood: complacent

Things That Go...that I have eaten

Animals I Have Eaten: By no means a definitive list, but trying
Pig + Offal(intestines, Hooves, Head)
Chicken (+Feet)
Sheep - Lamb/Mutton/Veal + Offal(Brains, Kidneys, Liver)
Cow - Beef
Insects - Meal worms
Lizzard - Goanna
Crustaceans - Prawns/Shrimp, Lobster, Crayfish, Marron/Yabbies, Crabs(Blue Manna, Mud), Morton Bay bugs
Molluscs - Scallops, Mussels, Oysters, Abalone, Pipies, , Clams, Sea Snail(Welks, Periwinkles), Cockles
Fish - (+ Caviar - Sturgeon,Flying fish) Shark, Stingray, Herring, Cod, Snapper, Red Emperor, Bass,
Bream, Tailor, Salmon, Tuna, Trout, Flounder, Sole, Flathead, Gournard, White bait/Smelt, Sardines,
Swordfish, Hake, Haddock, Whiting, Carp, Bonito, Catfish, John Dory, Mackrel, Trumpeter, Monkfish, Perch
Frog (Legs)
Dog or Cat - maybe
10:02am 04/10/2006
mood: cold
All below posts are now deemed Weak and Shit!

By Me!!!
     Read 1 - Post
Some stupid rants :....   
09:14am 04/10/2006
mood: crazy
Just Ignore them.

Really , they will get blue-ball and all submit to some kind of

depraved thing for wich they have no repentance..im sure theyn will

hate that

I cant wait for the day they come to my home in a mastaboatory frenzy

of un-acknoledgement trying to make me not watch 18th seaseon

simpsons and watch them either beat a woman into servitude, kill a

person who doesnt agree with them or try and blow themselves up

And they better take me out!

Cos i love simpsons and am so over any form of religious wankery! ,

ill smudge them into my drive-way.

EDIT:...but thats what happens when you get me at 5:29am after no



Hail Satin! Master! Weeping Homos Burnt at.... some designers house

for being like OMG! Satin one-peice?! like HELLO!


Christ is dead, i worshiped the day he died and got chocolate.

If you some how belive in "magical powers" and he came back alive,

then your just odd!

Christianity is stupid


Worst movie?

The one where the woman defecates on a plate and the guy uses an

knife and fork to eat it...

Worst ever!...If i wanted Vanilla kaviar i would have just gone to

the loo@!


I kept an aquarium for some time , found it unrewarding and a lot of work.

Sure it bubbled, but that was the filter i had to add to liven it up!


Theres nothing wrong with bush , sure, i make them shave but really...some people like the '70's style....

GW on the other hand...well.....


The Very Best of Bestiality 3 , never fails to make an impression

4 Wedding and a Funeral?
Sleepless in Seattle ?
Notting Hill.?

...Only if your dating your mum!


<"????? writes...
"I actually prefer this album to the first - it's a great follow up in that it's not trying to simply be the first album again, but it also sounds very Killers. Can't wait to see them at BDO"">

God, and im sure you also say "no, kissings fine, we dont have to go further"


"Ok honey...hmmm... a strapon...well..."

this album feasts on ass

last album - some kind of polio disco

this album - died from passive smoking at a midget circus...

enuff said!
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I thought WISDOM..they thought    
03:16am 04/10/2006
mood: chipper
The post started on : Infildelity : Would you do it?

To which the only real reply is : You gotta get a girl first DORKS!

A lovely post to two guys who didnt know why women were "whores" and "cheated"...well not like they ever got close to anything but simple false-dates, ...welllll....

It was instantly cut/deleted from the nerd forum i posted it on anyways...

( http://forums.whirlpool.net.au/forum-replies.cfm?t=573700&p=-1#bottom )


This was one long post with two quotes from previous posts in it , after deletion i instantly posted the mod, RE: Nerd Sex ...and the fuckers still havent banned me for life (tho there is another post of mine on LJ about that)

" Nice guys finish last. It's absolutely true. Take any above average looking girl and watch her date jerk after jerk. Women loves the assholes and it's undeniable."

At the end of the day...it quality , it really is, and you have to also accept some women want the "pound" as much as you...whats hot for you is different for them , the jerk is a guy whos gonna go animal-pound for them...ok....they dont LOVE them....its like you and anyone you find and want for the same reason

If this offends..well...really did you want that woman in the end then?

Learn quality control or....just get a brain!!!

Women want sex as much as you, and im sure your a classic catch eh?..

Jerk?...maybe not ,

attractive/good in bed?... well i think the women have judged

You may be a good "Lifepartner" but...really...they wanna get hard-layed guy!

Maybe you dont cut it for them in that ballpark..or at least they cant see that

"i keep hearing that, so why don't we all just take a step up and play along with the girls. if they want a jerk, then lets give it to them then dump them because in the end they're only playing themselves."

You dont see why people go out with peopel for sex?

Can you not communicate with women enuff to know they want sex as much as guys?

I just dont know how you idiots get in such dumb situations...

I guess its living the lives of the "scene" you chose...unfortuantly that scene is some bump-n-grind RnB stupid factory, and its your own fault...

Keep up the flow of money for the leach whores and......

Love is , for you, and you will find this fast, A woman who really doesnt love you, a mortgage and a kid.....of couse you will cheat...you ruined your life guy!!!!

wake up



Ok, After a long rant , back and forth with a MOD(an absolute laugh-riot in itself...) I got it to be alowed back up...with MAJOR editing!(they really disliked the word "pound")

The post ends up like this:::

" Nice guys finish last. It's absolutely true. Take any above average looking girl and watch her date jerk after jerk. Women loves the assholes and it's undeniable."

At the end of the day...it quality , it really is, and you have to also accept some women want the "loving" as much as you...whats hot for you is different for them , The jerk is a guy whos gonna go "animal-loving" for them...ok....They dont LOVE them....Its like you and anyone you find and want for the same reason.

If this offends..well...really did you want that woman in the end then?

Learn quality control

Women want loving as much as you,

You may be a good "Lifepartner" but...really...they wanna get "hard-loving" guy!

Maybe you dont cut it for them in that ballpark..or at least they cant see that.

" i keep hearing that, so why don't we all just take a step up and play along with the girls. if they want a jerk, then lets give it to them then dump them because in the end they're only playing themselves. "

Communicate with women enuff and know they want loving as much as any guy

Or you may end up with a woman who really doesnt love you, a mortgage and a kid.....of couse you will cheat...you ruined your life guy!!!!

Are you looking in the right places?

Brilliant stuff eh??...ahahahhahahahalololololollolo....burn


OK and this is like 4:30am WST , 6:30am EST...

First post to reply...IGNORE MY BRILLIANCE and WISOM and dive into the following cess-pit

Dragon Curve writes...

Take any above average looking girl and watch her date jerk after jerk. Women loves the assholes and it's undeniable.

How true ... Seen these evil alphas destroy many supposedly intelligent women friends including doctors, teachers and other professionals.

Dragon Curve writes...

Nice guys finish last. It's absolutely true. Take any above average looking girl and watch her date jerk after jerk. Women loves the assholes and it's undeniable.

Definitely. I don't get why they do this. And then when they do and they break up they start worrying because they can't find "Mr. Right"

They almost as if want to be treated like crap just so they can have something to cry and complain over.

This is a forum/thread of tools right?

Am i in Bunnings?

Really god!



you make me want to puke!!!!!!!

and relly ill stopnow cos this will go ON and ON!!!

all i can say is get a Whirlpool login from someone with full acess and just DIE!!!!
A rant about an album i have never heard....   
02:37am 04/10/2006
mood: devious
This is a rant i did on Whirlpool forums about the new Killer album, never heard it , but they did the "Somebody told me ..." song right??....Based on previous comment in the thread , a bit od a look on wikipedia, and that i had heard the "Somebody told me..." song ages ago...Oh, and i was a bit drunk...so extra points eh?

Edit: it starts from the point of people discussing it as good/not as good etc...regular shit, I come in on the idea of second albums being a hard thing...something that was being tapped on lightly by the previous posts....

Example post:
"After a few listens, i like it. Not as good as their first but it still has some great tracks and it is a very listenable album. I am absolutely loving Uncle Jonny, it just gets my foot bouncin and such catchy lyrics, "when everybody else refrain, my uncle jonny did cocaine". Quite a few good songs, When you were young, Bling, my list and sam's town is also good. I think i'll be listening to the album for a while."



Its their album to try and "catch the fire" of their first glory , something that in this time is usually impossible if you are but a one-of-many bands that come out, "unknown" really to the normals ears, with a hit single, It is also the album that is their demise.

A second album in these times is really not worth it unless you started with a real fan base, other than popular radio, or you are prepared for a hard slog into anonymity again . And for a band with no real history in such a place aka:clubs. making the real/fan connections, working you way up...etc...Its more of a fall from grace into the failure and collapse of band ,and whos to say not members....

I don't listen to this music really, but I'm not ignorant of trend or music in general.
I do listen to popular music , usually by force (associates/ family)...this does not mean i hate what i hear, but i hear in context.

because of the above....

I have heard their previous album many time, especially the singles, but yes, i have heard their whole previous album

And i have recently heard this whole album. twice or more even, in various sittings...and the first single, many, many times...

Sams Town is a very bad name for an album to start with , I'm guessing they decided to make an album that had lyrics that "connect" with people , like stories from life/the streets....
I didn't like it and i think the single defines what they "wanted" but failed to get as the album progressed....next single is no better mind....it is on the album, so you have all heard it I'm sure, before it gets repeated adnauseum by radio...

The idea of connecting becomes strange at this point, the reason to choose who and why to anylize in the lyrics is odd...apart from the obvious love songs etc...which are always base in their subtext

The first single "When You Were Young" expounds on my above criticisms and is in no way close to their previous output. The style is poor (i agree partially with the "American" and "springsteen" style/feel evident, as listed on wikipedia, tho its more(and a lot less) than that...), the music is not up to par of previous releases, and, to make such a "leap" is one into the depths of anonymity.

I don't see us hearing from this band after the rote spouting of their next single/singles and their demise/death rattle.

or?, we can only hope I'm right
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Ed n Brads un-ninja life   
11:35am 01/10/2006
mood: cheerful
I saw brad and ed at an eazyplus and they had the top of theor bodies attached to one pair of females legs that they shared.
they always wore small girls kilts only
They both had fangs growing out of their baccks with peices of toilet paper stuck to them because they had a hard time using a single ass

One day they went to a roman baths to find some action and theire they found a transexual who wanted to pee on them except they pulled out a small dick that grew like a ballon till it filled the room up, it poped and pee came out and every one flowed out the building past a hobo, Th hobo sotle their skirts an said "Woo! i am rich!"

One day ed was sitting in a park, just masturbating be hind a tree and watching ducks , as per usualy , when he suddenly heard a cackling noise...he looked around and shat his pants which he didnt have on so it sprayed up his back and on his shirt...Suddenly there was a wich standing in fron to hims and then in a flash it became an alien and flew off like a lightening bolt

Ed got really scared now, twice a much and his dick exploded , after he saw the smoke rise from his crotch he shat his pants again and tunrd into dust , and it made a squeeking noise when he did

the end

I saw ed at a Eazyplus and he had an ugly chiled growing out of his chest, but the child was really a 55 year old street-loner who had been growing there for many years...they kept kissing and the loner kept yelling profanities

Ed and him then went to a transexuals house to get peed on

The loner kept the pee in a small chinese container and they re-created the tranny-pee-session with GI joes made up to look like them at their own house many times

Ed emits profetic fogs from his twin ass's
He uses words like "Off tha heeezzeee" to describe the fog and only has pictures of fog in his house exclusivly. The calls himself "Tha Foo" and rapps about fog in a childs voice

He calls his ass "Kid Kandy"

and says it puts thoughts in his head during the night..but normal people hear a dog barking, The thoughts are about women made of faberge eggs, sulfer and golden ducks
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11:43am 20/08/2006
mood: cheerful


11:37pm 08/07/2006
  What scent did Sean Connery and Rodger More wear to the 50th aniversary of James Bond?



Glowhommed - 100ft tall prophet , he was working for his fam when radiation fukked him up and now he wants nukes for iran and shit...extrapolate from there ...lol
02:43pm 25/04/2006
mood: chipper

Full Sex Trucker
Trucker theme album work
Business themed lyrics
StarWars Stormtrooper uniforms
Snacks on a Plane   
08:22pm 22/04/2006
  Snacks on a Plane!

Smauel L Jackson : Sambo? Mutha Fukking Sambo? Thats Its! , I have had Enough of these Crisps!!!
10:41am 17/04/2006
  Hitler Elvis

Jew Suede Shoes
09:31am 17/04/2006
mood: chipper
Sigmund Frang , aporno about psychology
01:08pm 08/04/2006
  Song : Orgy in the Sky with Brian

On Site Bereavements : We turn up at accidents and Provide Funereal atmospheres and weepings.
Keeping it REAL so you can FEEL!

Accordians , Organs, Women and Men in Gothic 1890's funeral garb.
09:25pm 03/04/2006
mood: shocked
===La Kraken Del Amore===

Kraken - "Bisnonno Del Mare"(Great Grandfather of the Sea)but his name is only revealed to Philonia at the very end of the drama when he confides in her his secret.

Heroine - Philamon.

Raspy One/Ahad - Ahab.

Son of Ahab and Philamon - Tussletoe.

Baratone : "Pleeaaaaaaasseee don't eat me !"

Soprano : "Plleeeaaaaaase don't eat him!"

Baratone : "Pleeeeeeaassee just let me be .... i am KRAKEN!"

Soprano : "Pleaaaasse just let him beeeeeeeeee !!! He's is KRAAAAAAAKEN!!!!"

Raspy One : "I will not ! I will not !!! It is him whom i besot !!!"

Raspy one : "He Is KRAAAAAAAKEN!!!!!! BEWARE !"

6 siren ladies on a rock all chorus : "Oh Kraaaken afraid ! he hides beneath the waves ! the evil ones they come with guns oh Kraaakeeen afraaaaid !"

Kraken loves a Heroine

Kraken : "It is yoouuuuu whooom myyy hearrtt pouuunndsss my Kraken fate ! You must stay away !!! the evil ones do hunt me !!!!"

Heroine : "But my breast heaves for your mighty tentacles !!!"

Kraken must save a little boy

Heronine : "oh kraken ! my mighty back is crackin' ! under the might of your veangeful stare!!!"

Heroine : "But you have saved me son !! he was my only one ! and now i will permit you to ..... sleeeeeeeeeep !"

Heroine : "Why can't you love me like Kraken!!?"

Ahab : "Be quiet your mouth! Get to scrubbing my floor and speaketh no mooooooore of the KRAAAAAAKEEEEEN !"

Ahabs wife leaves him for Kraken! Ahabs son must be saved by Kraken to cessate Ahabs relentless pursuit of the mighty beast

Ahab has a dark yet riteous heart, but Kraken makes him realise that he is the true plague apon the goodness that be bestowed from one soul to another